It’s been 39 days

It’s been 39 days since I stepped out of the house. I have actually not gone outside even a bit. Other family members have gone out on drives, to stores, to pick up delivered stuff, and so on. I haven’t ventured outside my doorstep, except to keep out the trash bin for collection.

The strange thing is I haven’t felt that I’ve missed out on anything! In fact, interacting with people virtually has been such a relief. The more I see of people, the less I want to interact with them, honestly. Sometimes, I can’t bear the noise levels in the house. It’s not even much – just the husband on a call, speaking sporadically; the daughter in class, answering a stray question; the thumping of the washing machine; the clang of dishes the maid is washing; the drilling, welding, and cutting sounds from the construction site opposite our place… I feel like they are amplified a hundred-fold, and want to dive underwater, where it’s all so quiet.

I like late nights the best, when everything is silent, or blanketed out by the whirring fan. Peace reigns, and I can breathe.

I think I’m finally ready for Vipassana.

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